April 2016

Coming Undone

There comes a time when something changes within us. A time after we have lived a measure of life inside complicated boxes. From a young age we were asked to step inside these boxes using the simple phrase, "You are . . ." We allowed others to fill in that blank. Family, Friends, and Faith -- everyone had an idea of who we should be and a perception of whom they thought we were. Instead of kindly correcting them, we marched obediently into our little boxes. We began to believe that we were the product advertised on the box. That belief became heavy.

Believing we were something else colored every aspect of our lives. We had a box for the type of man or woman we would be. There was a box for the type of spouse we would be. There was box for the type of parent we would be. There was even a box for the type of leader we would be. As we aged and grew, we were comfortable with that weight.

Then, as we get older, we find ourselves in a warehouse filled with boxes of everything we should be, and we catch a glimmer of light. Sometimes a single ray through a rusty gap in the door. Intrigued, we open that door. We step into the bright sunshine that illuminates everything about us and we recognize ourselves as who we really are. The boxes fall from the shelves behind us, coming undone and spilling their emptiness. We never really were those things and the tension of trying to fit into those boxes burdened us. We had lost our lightness.
It is okay to come undone. Embrace the person you are with love, compassion, and above all excitement. Don’t be afraid to say, “I am . . .” Think differently. Perceive the world differently. Embrace family, friends and faith as yourself. It is entirely possible to age into an awakening and to come undone . . . beautifully.
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